Gender Queer by Maia Kobabe 🔖🔖🔖🔖

First published May 28, 2019 

__________

Literary awards: Stonewall Book Award Nominee for Non-Fiction 2020, ALA Alex Award 2020, Lincoln Award Nominee 2023. Most challenged book 2021, 2022, 2023. 

__________

In 2014, Maia Kobabe, who uses e/em/eir pronouns, thought that a comic of reading statistics would be the last autobiographical comic e would ever write. At the time, it was the only thing e felt comfortable with strangers knowing about em. Now, Gender Queer is here. Maia's intensely cathartic autobiography charts eir journey of self-identity, which includes the mortification and confusion of adolescent crushes, grappling with how to come out to family and society, bonding with friends over erotic gay fanfiction, and facing the trauma of pap smears. Started as a way to explain to eir family what it means to be nonbinary and asexual, Gender Queer is more than a personal story: it is a useful and touching guide on gender identity—what it means and how to think about it—for advocates, friends, and humans everywhere. (source: goodreads.com)

__________

This is an important piece of literature for teens and young adults struggling with their feelings and identities. It offers a safe and inclusive, accepting and open way to discuss such matters. Ideally, this would be read with parents or guardians so frank discussion about some of the matters discussed and represented could be fully explored and worked through. Unfortunately, we don't live in that world for the most part. I do plan to have this on my shelves and my teen can read it if he so chooses, though I may put a note on the front that I'd like to be a part of this experience and am open for discussion. As many parents will not be supportive of this kind of journey for their kids (or anyone else's for that matter) I think this should be available to kids who need to have this representation to diminish the feeling of being broken, bad, a freak, an abomination, or alone.

__________

Why this was banned: "obscene" sexual activities and sexual nudity; alternate gender ideologies; and profanity.

"Obscene" sexual activities and nudity: 

• There is a depiction of a partner giving oral sex to the main character wearing a strap on. The character did not enjoy it and they both determined to "try something else". 
• There are other pages where kink is discussed (autoandrophilia) and setting a boundary about "penetration is a hard no for me" and being "grossed out" by "some bodily fluids." 
• Sexting is depicting wherein the partner of the main character describes the strap on, dildo, blow job, and wanting the strap on inside them. 
• There is discussion between the main character and the doctor using accurate terms like vaginal canal, cervical cancer, clitoris, and penis. 
• Representation of sex ed classes with accurate terms, a banana with a condom, and discussion of STIs. 
• The main character imagines what it would be like to have a penis in underwear resting against eir thigh. 
• The main character goes to a doctor and changing into a gown is shown, depicting frontal female nudity. 
• The main character discusses with sister about "putting something into your vagina" and suggested a finger, and then tasting "yourself." The drawing continues to show the character with "vagina slime" on eir finger and then refusing to do it. 
• Depictions of a bloody pad during eir period, and blood on eir legs while in the bathroom. 
• There's a page depicting masturbation through pants, and two male presenting people apparently nude (you can see no clothing and the top of buttocks), one laying on top of the other kissing. 
• There is a representation of apparent Greek art (Plato's symposium) with two nude male presenting people, one who is holding the penis of the other. 

Alternate gender ideologies: 

• Obviously. This is a personal journey shared by a human experiencing "an alternate gender".  

Profanity: 

• Very minimal. Four curse words, three said once, and the S word said 6 times.

The challenges were also concerned about references to other things "curious kids might look up." 

• Autoandrophilia the proposed paraphilic tendency of a biological female to be sexually aroused by the thought of becoming a male.
• Sexting
• Lesbian/Gay Porn
• Pleasure & Heart- sex toy store
• "Oh Joy Sex Toy"  webcomic by Erika Moen
• "Fake" series by Sanami Matoh
• "The Last Herald Mage Triology" by Mercedes Lackey

Would I let me kid read this book? Yes. Especially if he were having questions about his identity, or if we needed to have a conversation about it. If he did read this, I would want it to be with discussions with us. 

It's important to point out two things:  All nudity is not pornography. Not all discussions about body parts are nefarious.